Posted by The following post is shared from Jim Button’s website
Gather with Jim
Jim is dealing with a second dose of renal cell carcinoma. He is a father of two, husband of one, brother of three and friend to many. His blog is a place “to share all of the good, some of the bad and maybe even a tiny bit of the ugly” of his cancer journey.
May 13, 2020
Disabled What is disability? Am I disabled?
A couple of months ago I met Andrea van Vugt for a coffee. This was pre-Covid. She had requested a meeting after hearing me banter back and forth on stage with Dave Kelly during a podcast recording at the GRAND.
I wasn’t sure what the meeting was about but I assumed she wanted to inform me about her project called Disability Pride and ask for some help.
From their website I found this description:
“Disability Pride is about being happy with who you are and sharing yourself with the people around you.
We have a mission to celebrate and empower the disability community. Hosting community events and conversations provides an opportunity for people with & without disabilities to celebrate diversity, inclusion and pride.
Let’s celebrate what makes each of us unique and how much we have in common!”
I learnt a lot in the meeting with respect to what is considered a disability and what isn’t. And towards the end of the meeting I asked Andrea how I might be able to help.
She said she was happy just to inform me but thought maybe I’d like to talk about my experience. I of course was happy to do so and said it would feel odd writing something as I didn’t consider myself to be disabled.
And then the philosophical conversation started. Who decides what a disability is? How do you define a disability? Are there categories of disability? Does a positive mindset preclude you from feeling like you have a disability?
And when I said I wasn’t disabled she thoughtfully looked at me and said ‘if you think you have a disability, then you have a disability.’ But obviously I didn’t think I was disabled so I kinda parked it and was happy to have learnt about an organization that was celebrating those that felt they were disabled.
Still, I promised I would write something from my perspective. She loves the discussion from all angles. Well, today as I had my second nap, was struggling to walk and felt nauseous all day I thought maybe, just maybe I am disabled physically. I used to be full of tons of energy, played sports all the time, ate pretty much anything and was always good to go. But now I have to be thoughtful how I use my energy.
And I’m actually quite proud of my positive mindset and ability to keep chugging along with a challenging chemotherapy program year after year. And the longer I do it the harder it seems to get; physically and mentally. The longer I am on chemotherapy the more disabled I feel.
But at the same time I’m proud that I can often push the side effects and the relentlessness of the disease aside in order to find joy in each day. So with this mindset I don’t think I’m disabled.
So, it’s taken me a couple of months to think through how I would follow through on my promise to Andrea, and today it came to me.
I can accept I have this disease and that the therapy causes challenges. And I can accept that could be seen as a disability when compared to the Jim of five years ago.
And I can accept my mind has expanded with respect to the term disabled. I imagine that all people that have been labelled disabled could have the same mindset as I do. That your perspective on your disability is all dependent on your mindset.
So I’m proud that I keep on chugging along even when the going gets tough.
And I’m proud that my positive mindset allows me to feel like I’m always moving forward, although a bit slower these days.
This was quite the philosophical introspective journey and I am a better person for having a new found perspective on disability and people with disabilities.
Thanks for the spark, and thanks for providing a wonderful support for a group of thoughtful people.
Thank YOU for reflecting and sharing, Jim!
Jim’s blog will bring you along as he goes through his “latest and decidedly most obtuse of adventures. My cancer journey.”
Check out more of Jim’s journey here:
People like Jim are really redefining the old stereotypes associated with the label/term “disabled”. Thanks for sharing this perspective.
You are truly an example to all when it comes to perspective. Thank you for always being ‘Jim’!
I agree, disability is a matter of perspective and it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. All the best on your journeys.